Jeannie Mai Opened Up About Her Marriage – And What She Said Stunned Her Co-Stars

So how exactly did Mai get everyone in a tizz? Did she enter into a war of words with a co-host a la The View’s Rosie O’Donnell and Elisabeth Hasselbeck? Was it the kind of questionable remark that constantly got The Talk’s Sharon Osbourne in hot water? Well, no, it was simply a personal belief about marriage.

Mai hadn’t yet walked down the aisle with her long-time boyfriend Jeezy at the time. But she still had a firm idea of how she wanted their married life to be. And much to the surprise of fellow panelists Adrienne Bailon Houghton, Garcelle Beauvais and Loni Love, Mai had very different views than you might expect.

These comments came seven months after Jeezy had proposed to Mai at his LA residence, as the latter soon revealed excitedly on Instagram. She wrote, “I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life loving you... Yes? Thank you, everyone, for celebrating this journey with us. We are praying love over everyone from here.”

A spokesperson for Mai told People magazine that the hip-hop star had initially planned ask the big question somewhere else. They said, “Jeannie and Jay were set for a trip to Vietnam this April. What Jeannie didn’t know is that Jay was planning to propose. Instead, Jay decided to bring Vietnam to Jeannie with a surprise quarantine date night in his home filled with Vietnamese food and décor.”

But it wasn’t just Jeezy’s engagement plans that went awry. After Mai gleefully accepted his proposal, the couple started dreaming about a big wedding at Lake Como in Northern Italy in front of their nearest and dearest. Once again, though, events ended up conspiring against them.

Firstly, there was the global pandemic, which made it difficult for any couple to exchange their vows in front of more than a handful of people. And then Jeezy suffered a devastating loss when his mom died suddenly. But after a year of stalling their plans, the rapper and Mai decided that March 27, 2021 should be the big day.

Speaking to Vogue shortly after, Mai explained how their revised wedding came about. She said, “At the end of the day, Jeezy and I really just wanted to become husband and wife. So we decided to turn our original wedding into a mini-mony, where we exchanged our vows in front of our immediate family and a few close friends.”

Having originally intended to tie the knot in Europe, Mai and Jeezy ended up marrying in their very own back garden. And the setting wasn’t the only unconventional thing about the ceremony. To begin proceedings, Mai’s brother guided the happy couple into a Vietnamese custom that saw them both pour tea. This is a way to embrace each other into their respective families.

The newlyweds then danced to a rendition of “Sweet Lady” performed live by none other than Tyrese himself. “The entire night was filled with speeches and funny memories from all our guests,” Mai recalled. “Not to be outdone, my mother, Mama Mai, kicked off the after-party with a special performance of her own.”

As you’d expect from a fashion expert, Mai walked down the aisle in style. The star worked with her regular stylist to put her own spin on a Galia Lahav outfit she hailed as “everything I envisioned.” And the groom also turned heads with a custom-made suit described by Vogue as “champagne blush.”

The newlyweds then finished the evening off with an after-party in their home during which they presented friends and family with souvenir slippers and pajamas. Mai and Jeezy also slipped into their own his-and-hers Versace silk nightwear. “And then we danced the night away to our favorite hits, feeling cozier than ever,” the former said.

Mai also revealed to Vogue readers that she and Jeezy’s first encounter had come when he appeared on The Real. But it took several years for the rapper to pluck up the courage to ask the host on a date. Mai recalled, “We shared a romantic sushi dinner in Los Angeles and salsa danced the night away. Later that evening, he asked if I could picture spending the rest of my life with him. And crazy enough, I could.”

Of course, Mai’s never been afraid to talk about her relationship with the Def Jam signing. In a 2020 interview with Entertainment Tonight, she described Jeezy as “such an inspiring person to be around.” The star also said that the obstacles they’d faced during their time together had only made them stronger. She added, “[Jeezy and I] looked at each other at this time of the quarantine like, ‘Yup, if we can do this, we are gangster.’ We’re [doing] amazing.”

That same year, she gushed about the romantic side that Jeezy displayed when she was on Dancing With the Stars. The rapper had hired an LA billboard to persuade passers-by to lend their support for his beau on the hit ABC series. And Mai was bowled over by this show of support.

“I don’t even know what the price tag is on that, but beyond that, just the gesture, to believe in us,” Mai told Entertainment Tonight. “That is the type of man he is, and I hope everyone seeing that now can understand why the mere gesture of dedicating a dance to him is the least I can do. Because he truly is the love of my life.”

Sadly, though, Mai’s dancing experience was cut short when she was diagnosed with epiglottis. The Holey Moley reporter told People that it was a special someone who’d encouraged her to seek emergency medical attention for the condition. Mai said, “I am very thankful for J, my fiancé, because it was his firmness in, ‘No, you’re going to the ER. We’re not turning the other way.’”

Mai admitted that things could’ve turned out a lot more seriously if Jeezy hadn’t been by her side. “Because if it were just me, I wouldn’t have made my way to the ER,” she added. “I would have made my way out to the parking and to go home to just, I don’t know, take something to suppress it to get through another day.” Thankfully, Mai soon returned to good health.

As you’d expect, Jeezy’s been a little less lovey-dovey about his relationship. But he’s still given the odd shout-out to Mai since they first made things Instagram-official in September 2019. When asked about the The Real host in a chat with Entertainment Tonight shortly afterwards, the rapper said, “Life is amazing. She’s amazing too, by the way.”

Of course, Jeezy isn’t the first man with whom Mai has walked down the aisle. In 2007 she said “I do” to Freddie Harteis, but after 11 years of marriage the pair decided to go their separate ways. And Mai admitted to People magazine that the issue of having kids had been a major factor.

Mai explained, “Before we got married, I was very clear about the fact that I probably would not have kids, just because I’ve never felt that. And now, getting older, he definitely seems like he wants kids, and he actually came out and said that he wants children.” The Real co-host went on to add that she didn’t feel comfortable being a stumbling block to Harteis’ paternal needs.

And Mai also became a little tearful when she talked about her first marriage on an episode of The Real in September 2020. She told her fellow panelists, “If you guys have friends that have been divorced, it is one of the most traumatic things that can happen because you just feel like you failed, you feel embarrassed of all those people that were there at your wedding. You get jaded.”

Luckily, Mai managed to bounce back from the heartbreak. “The thing I think that saved me is that I never gave up on love,” she added. “I never gave up on love because love is so omnipresent and it’s so healing that the only reason why I recognize healthy love with Jay today is because I took that time to love myself.”

Mai’d first discussed her relationship with Jeezy in detail on The Real more than a year earlier. She said, “I’m not one for small talk or small conversations, I want to know, ‘Why do you think the way you do? What brought you to look at things the way you do? Who are you? Who’s important to you?’ And I found my equal.”

But Mai proved to be less endearing to some when she again addressed her relationship on the show in October 2020. In fact, the former make-up artist suffered a bit of a backlash for the remarks she made ahead of her impending wedding. And that’s because Mai freely admitted that in her marriage with husband-to-be Jeezy she intended to be submissive.

“I want to submit to my man,” Mai explained. “When I hear this definition... Submitting has a negative connotation. It means that you are less important, you are lower than that person that you’re submitting to. It usually can be like, you know, referenced as somebody who works lower than you, and that’s not what I’m referring to here.”

Publicist, lawyer, manager. They’re just a few of the roles Mai’s taken on over the years. And she referenced this fact to prove that she’s capable of making key decisions in her professional life. But the star’s more than happy for Jeezy to take the lead when it comes to her personal one.

Yet Mai was keen to point out that doesn’t mean that Jeezy gets full control. She added, “It’s a ‘You know what? I think that we would do best here, I want to do this.’ And he takes the decision, he formulates it with our overall vision, and he leads us and I like to submit to that.”

So what inspired Mai to have this outlook on marriage? Well, alongside growing tired of having to be so decisive all the time, she also looked toward her parents’ failed relationship. Mai explained, “My mom... She has a very strong force, and she took over a lot of decisions in the household, to the point that my dad, unless it was always going to be a fight, he was like, ‘You know what? Go ahead.’ And that caused a wedge.”

“I can have a tendency to follow like my mom, ’cause it’s what I grew up in and I saw it,” Mai continued. “And I saw in my living space, I would all of a sudden just wake up and go and make decisions without asking and checking in, so I am the fault that can cause an inequality because I am pulling in habits from my old household to how I run my business today. That is not okay.”

And it’s fair to say that Mai’s comments didn’t go down well with some viewers. But if you thought The Real host would apologize for speaking her mind, think again. In fact, Mai went on to double down on her views several times. Firstly, she defiantly told The Tamron Hall Show, “I am 41. I don’t care what kind of pushback I get from other women. This is my life.”

Mai added, “Coming out of divorce and also making a major decision to marry again after finding such a beautiful person, I want to be very clear and open about how our life can be so we can make sure our vision is aligned and that we both are empathetic to each other… Jay is my king. So I want him to understand what I look forward to in the role and he has to honor his queen.”

Several days later Mai took to Instagram to reiterate her thoughts on marriage. Alongside a sassy-looking selfie, the San Jose native told her followers, “By giving the power to have someone lead in your life is power in itself. The power to relinquish control. You ‘willingly submit’ not ‘forcibly submit.’” And Mai wasn’t done there, either.

Later on that same week she was asked about the furor by Entertainment Tonight, while she was promoting her stint on Dancing With the Stars. The TV host answered, “I think a lot of women need to hear – and not saying it is right for you, but you also need to understand – when you give power to somebody, that’s also a power move itself. He is not going to have power if I don’t give that to him.”

“I have that power to be able to share that with him,” Mai continued. “To say, ‘I want you to lead. I want you to do what you do well as a man that I am trusting you to do. Take in my thoughts, my wishes, my dreams and then compute that into a vision for us that I can feel safe and secure knowing that you can lead us.’”

Of course, Mai soon had other things to keep her mind occupied. First, there was the health scare that forced her to leave Dancing With the Stars and then the actual wedding itself. Sadly, due to circumstances beyond her control, Mai wasn’t able to invite her The Real co-hosts to the occasion. But she later told her YouTube channel viewers that there were no hard feelings.

Referring to her scaled-down wedding, Mai explained, “I did call them all ahead of time to let them know that we were doing this. They were actually the first to know that we were having a secret ceremony, and they kept their secret.” The star then revealed that she and Jeezy would be having a much bigger celebration in the future that Beauvais, Love and Bailon could come to.

Mai’s The Real co-hosts may well have been grateful they weren’t allowed to show up after hearing just how lengthy their colleague’s vows were. In an interview with People, the newlywed said, “Everybody knows on The Real that I’m long-winded. So my vows were on three pages and I read every word to him.”

In contrast, husband Jeezy opted for a free-styling approach. Mai explained, “For Jay, he’s a man of words. He’s an artist, a songwriter, and he knows exactly how to describe what it feels to marry me. We knew right away that we wanted to write our vows. Jay didn’t write down his vows, he spoke them from the heart.”

So what’s next for the newlyweds? Well, in April 2021 Mai told People, “I’m excited to call him my husband and he’s so excited to call me his wife. I just can’t wait to start our love story. I mean, it’s already been written, but even more so now I’m eager to just fill out our entire journey. I’m just excited to start.”