A Woman Finally Found Her Biological Father And Knew She Had To Help Him
Even though she was happily married with a loving family, one question continued to nag at the mind of Deanna Shrodes. She’d been adopted as a child, and she wanted to uncover the identity and whereabouts of her biological dad. Following a search that lasted decades, Deanna finally got her answer. She was full of trepidation before she first spoke to him over the phone, but she couldn’t have been prepared for just how much would be on the line.
Meeting the Shrodes family
Deanna, an ordained minister, lives near Tampa, Florida, with her husband, Larry, who works as pastor. They have three adult children and some grandchildren. So Deanna’s life was looking pretty good.
Yet the mystery surrounding her origins was casting a constant shadow over her. For years, she’d known absolutely nothing about her birth parents. Mind you, the mom-of-three didn’t intend on bottling up that curiosity.
“I have to know where I started”
Deanna went into more detail while chatting with CBS Mornings in November 2022. The Florida minister explained, “I have to know where I started. And I have to know who else out there is a part of me. That desire never, never, never left.”
Her search for answers didn’t bear immediate results, though. Deanna had to wait until she was in her late 20s to make a significant breakthrough, which coincided with her journey into motherhood.
“Not open to meeting me”
Deanna finally learned the identity of her biological mother: the woman’s name was Sally King. She must have been extremely excited, yet that joy was soon dampened by Sally’s reaction to being found.
“She was not open to meeting me,” Deanna recalled. This must have been quite the blow, but it did little to deter her from dropping the matter. “Then, I went and met her personally,” she continued. “I just showed up, and knocked on the door.”
Catching up on lost time
Fortunately for Deanna, Sally didn’t turn her away. Instead, the pair began to form a bond that would span the next two decades. They became extremely close, catching up on all their lost time as mom and daughter.
But despite that, one subject was definitely off the table when it came to their discussions. “Who is my father?” Deanna would ask, only to be rebuffed at every opportunity. Sally had no interest in providing an answer.
“Go to the grave with the name”
In fact, Sally couldn’t have been clearer with her response to the question. Deanna told CBS Mornings, “[My mom had said], ‘I’m gonna go to the grave with the name.’” That stance didn’t change one iota as time went on, leading to a heartbreaking moment in the summer of 2019.
Even though the two women were practically inseparable, Sally had kept an additional secret from her daughter: her worsening health. And to say it blindsided Deanna would be a major understatement.
“There was cancer brewing”
“[I] had no idea she was sick,” Deanna noted. “I had no idea that there was cancer brewing. Weeks later, she was diagnosed and a couple of months later she was dead.” Just like that, their wonderful reunion had come to an ending as sad as it was abrupt.
And in the process, Sally kept her word. She quite literally took the name of Deanna’s biological dad to her grave. But she had given her daughter a couple of vital clues prior to her passing in August 2019.
The search begins
Over time, Sally had revealed that Deanna’s dad came from a Greek family and lived in Richmond, Virginia. It wasn’t much, but it at least gave the minister a starting point in her bid to find him. How would she go about it, though?
Well, that’s where social media came in. Deanna jumped on Facebook and put together a private group which included some pals and a number of volunteers. Its name? “Finding Mr. Greek.”
Period of frustration
Deanna was hoping that the group could unearth some potential leads through the social media platform. And she didn’t stop there, either. Alongside that, the mom-of-three joined several DNA registry services as well. Who’s to say that she wouldn’t get lucky?
Yet positive developments were thin on the ground after everything was set up. Frustratingly, Deanna just couldn’t find the breakthrough that would ultimately point her in the direction of her dad.
“This is terrible”
“It’s been ten years [since I signed up to the DNA registries],” Deanna informed CBS Mornings in November 2022. “I got maybe five matches on my father’s side. So I’m like, ‘This is terrible. We don’t have anything to work with here on the DNA side [of things].’”
She’d have been forgiven for harboring doubts at that stage: a lot of people might’ve just thrown in the towel. But Deanna didn’t give up. Instead, she turned to a different source for help.
Divine intervention?
As a minister, Deanna hoped that her consistent prayers would cough up a better lead. And remarkably, they seemed to work. She recalled, “I told my husband, I told my best friend Laura. I said, ‘Listen guys, you might think I’m crazy."
“‘But I was in prayer, God spoke this to me: Your father’s name is Gus.’” Then in May 2022 there was another development that further backed up what Deanna heard in her prayer. It came via one of the DNA registries.
“Uncle Gus’ daughter”
Deanna was connected to a cousin who she’d never seen or heard about before through the web service. Now that in itself was pretty cool, but what happened next really pushed things over the top.
“I reached out to this cousin and I said, ‘We’ve just matched on 23andMe,’” she continued. “And he said, ‘I think you’re my Uncle Gus’ daughter.’ I said, ‘I think that, too.’” Incredibly, the “divine” answer from Deanna’s earlier prayer had been bang on the money!
The breakthrough
The “Uncle Gus” in question was Gus Nicholas, a 92-year-old who’d been a lifetime resident of Richmond. He’d lived the life of a bachelor, choosing not to get hitched at any point. Gus had worked as a ballroom dance teacher up until he retired.
Finally, Deanna had her breakthrough, and it’s fair to say that it exceeded her expectations. For the longest time, she had been convinced that her biological dad had probably long since passed away.
“Absolutely mind-blowing”
Deanna stated, “I prepared myself to find a grave, and I now found a person. And it was just absolutely mind-blowing. [I] couldn’t believe that I had found a person.”
So without wishing to waste any time, the Florida resident picked up her phone and got in touch with Gus just 24 hours later. Mind you, as we noted earlier, Deanna had been wracked with anxiety while waiting for him to answer. And you could hardly blame her for feeling that way.
Reasons to be anxious
“My heart was beating out of my chest,” Deanna said to CBS Mornings. “I was like, ‘What is this going to be like? Is he going to accept me? Is he going to want to see me?’” Now given what initially happened with her birth mom, these were valid questions.
Would Gus react the same way as Sally had in the past? Well, it didn’t take long for Deanna to find out, as the phone conversation got going between the pair.
“I’m not alone in the world anymore”
Deanna continued, “When I found him, he was so excited to be found. He said, ‘I woke up this morning and I was alone. Now this afternoon, I have a daughter. I have a son-in-law. I have three grandchildren. I have great-grandchildren.’"
“He said, ‘I’m not alone in the world anymore.’ And I said, ‘No you’re not. You’re not.’” It was an absolutely beautiful moment that changed both their lives forever. And Deanna was eager to meet him as soon as possible.
A bedside meeting
So, just days after reconnecting over the phone, Deanna traveled to Richmond to see her biological dad in the flesh. But unfortunately, they didn’t meet at Gus’ house. Four months before their chat, he’d suffered a fall at home that had left him completely incapacitated.
After the accident he was relocated to a nearby nursing facility: it was clear that at his advanced age, Gus had lost the ability to look after himself. This was the situation when his daughter turned up at his bedside in May 2022, as documented in a heartwarming YouTube clip.
“I’m glad you’re here”
“Well I’m here!” Deanna says to her bedridden dad while holding his hand. Gus responds, “I’m glad you’re here,” before sharing a heartwarming hug with her. “I’m glad I’m here, too,” she beams. It’s one of the most tender reunions you could ever wish to see.
They were connected from that moment on, sharing some very personal conversations over the coming weeks. More specifically, the nonagenarian was concerned about what the future held for him at the nursing home.
“Don’t let me die in here”
Deanna told CBS Mornings, “Gus would say to me, ‘Please don’t let me die in here. Don’t let me die in here.’ And I said, ‘You know what, we’re going to make sure [that doesn’t happen].’” So what did she have in mind?
Well, the minister’s idea might’ve caught a lot of people off guard. Lest we forget, she and Gus still didn’t really know each other at that point, despite their blood ties. They’d been strangers for Deanna’s whole life!
An incredible gesture
Even so, in the YouTube clip Deanna doesn’t hesitate in asking her dad the following question: “Would you like to come and live with me?” And Gus accepts the invitation in a heartbeat. Just like that, he has been given the chance to spend even more time with his daughter over 50 years after she had first been put up for adoption.
It’s the kind of story that wouldn’t look out of place in a heartwarming Hollywood movie! Gus eventually departed for Florida some 75 days on from the initial phone conversation.
Providing full-time care
Deanna and her husband picked Gus up and drove him to their Sunshine State home. Once they got there, the former dance teacher was then made comfortable in the guest bedroom.
Due to his health, his daughter took on the responsibility of caring for him, as Gus couldn’t leave his bed. It was a task that would’ve overwhelmed plenty of folks, but Deanna didn’t waver. She threw herself wholeheartedly into the task at hand, looking after her elderly dad around the clock.
Filling the room with memories
Deanna both cooked for and fed Gus, dishing up Greek cuisine in her kitchen. As for her father’s room itself, she and her hubby personalized it with various keepsakes from his life.
Items such as his hat, his dancing shoes, and several gold dance trophies made the trip from the nursing home. Plus, a framed photo of Gus during his younger years was put up, too. The whole space looked lovely. And when he was well enough, the nonagenarian did share tales of his past.
“It feels good”
For instance, Gus shed some light on his relationship with Sally. He told Deanna, “I knew your mother. For 60 some years I knew her.” He even provided a few words to the CBS Mornings cameras in November 2022 from his bed.
When asked by the CBS reporter about his reconnection with Deanna, Gus responded, “It feels good. I found my daughter and my daughter found me.” Speaking of his daughter, she offered a bit of insight into what this experience was like from her perspective.
“I’m living the dream”
Deanna stated, “It is the most worthwhile thing I’ve ever done in my life. It’s the hardest thing, it’s the most worthwhile thing. It’s the most incredible miracle I’ve ever had the privilege to live out. I’m living the dream.”
Sadly, though, that beautiful “dream” came to an end in December 2022. At the age of 92, Gus passed away, leaving behind the family he was still getting to know in Florida. He was laid to rest alongside Deanna’s grandparents.
A touching birthday message
Even though he only knew Deanna and her loved ones for a few months, Gus’ impact on his daughter’s life couldn’t be contested. It was clear for all to see when his birthday rolled around in the fall of 2023.
In mid-October she took to Facebook to share a touching message. Deanna wrote, “Happy heavenly birthday, Baba. I wish that I could make you a Greek salad and have Larry grill some lamb chops, and make all the rest of your favorites.”
“Since you’ve been gone”
Gus had been a big fan of baked potatoes and peas, as well as pistachio cheesecake for dessert. Deanna continued, “I’d make it happen — and MORE. I know you’re having much better of whatever you’re having where you are."
“But of course, I wish we could have even just one more meal and [a] long conversation. And someday, WE WILL! I still haven’t cooked up ‘the best breakfast’ as you always called it, and enjoyed it for myself since you’ve been gone.”
“The ache is there”
That wasn’t the only thing that Deanna had struggled to do in the months following her dad’s passing, either. As she explained, “I haven’t even perused the aisle at the store with the raspberry preserves since you’ve been gone. I did start eating fish again, the way you like it."
“I listen to our music often. Some days I can do it happily and others, not so much. To clarify, it’s always a happy memory, but the ache is there. I stay incredibly busy which helps.”
No regrets
As for their relationship as a whole, Deanna only looked back on it with fondness in the post. It may have been brief, but she couldn’t have felt more fulfilled.
The minister penned, “I don’t have even one regret of things left unsaid, because I had stored up so many questions to ask you and so many things to say, over the years, in hopes that I’d get that chance. And I did. There isn’t even one burning question left unasked, or thing I wish I would have told you.”
“One more hug would mean everything!”
“But one more hug would mean everything!” Deanna then noted. “Someday it’ll happen, of course.” From there, the mom-of-three went on to conclude the birthday message with a rather bittersweet passage that rounded off her still-raw emotions.
And her words are sure to resonate with those who’ve lost parents or loved ones over the years. As the old expression goes, time and tide wait for no man, regardless of painful life experiences.
“Forever grateful”
Deanna added, “Although I didn’t leave anything unsaid, there are good things happening that I wish I could tell you in person, but somehow I feel like you know and are cheering from the grandstands of Heaven."
“Not a day goes by when I don’t think so many thoughts of you, and I am forever grateful that you opened your heart to me. I’ll see you soon.” We get the feeling that Gus will be staying in his daughter’s mind for the rest of her days.